Obligatory Love
by gilmoregirl913
Summary: Set after 3.06. Possibly OneShot. Addek all the way.


**A/N: Set after 3.06: Let the Angels Commit. Everything that happened before happened, but what happens after said episode is up to me. Nancy told Derek to get himself space. But all he finds himself thinking about is Addison.**

**I don't know if this is just a oneshot or if I'll continue it. I▓m very bad at writing more than one fic at a time. And since I'm working on Just an Egg right now, this one might get pushed to the back for a while. Or maybe it'll end right here and now. I just have to get this idea out.**

**Also, I don't know if anyone has noticed this, but on Maroon 5's CD It Won't Be Soon Before Long, it seems like every song could describe Addison and Derek, or how Derek should've felt, or whatever.**

xxxxxxx

Derek was taking his time. He had broken things off with Meredith a few weeks ago. He had avoided her. He was avoiding Addison, it hurt to look at her. His wife. Ex-wife. Regardless. Three signatures on divorce papers didn't take away from the fact that he had been married for 11 years. But she was so happy with Sloan. Well, happy enough. He still saw her squirm away from his touches. He had heard an argument they had had in the stairwell yesterday.

_"Come on, Addison, we're sleeping together now"  
"No, we're not"  
"We are and you know it. It's not like you don't enjoy it"  
"Mark, go away. You and I will never work out. I was an idiot to sleep with you"  
"When? When you were married? Now? When"  
"All of it. But mostly, the one time that ruined my marriage"  
"And the two months after"  
Addison had opened her mouth and shut it. "That was when we tried, Mark, and it didn't work. I caught you sleeping with that other girl. I mean, what was that"  
"Exactly what Derek walked into"  
"No. What Derek walked in on was much worse. What Derek walked in on is one night I never want to remember. What Derek walked in on was his best friend having sex with his wife of eleven years. When I end up in hell, I'm going to beg on my hands and knees to the Devil himself to not make me remember that for forever. I'd remember anything but that. Anything"  
"So that's why you were screaming my name that night. Because you were having such a bad time"  
"Mark. I just don't want you here anymore. We tried. Again. But next thing I know, you'll have slept with an intern of some sort"  
"If I made it Meredith Grey would you mind then? I mean, I could break up┘what do they call him, McDreamy and Meredith. I could make Derek miserable"  
"Mark, I don't want Derek to be miserable. He's my husband"  
"Ex-husband"  
"Ex-husband. Regardless. He doesn't deserve to be miserable. I do. Not him"  
"Addison, you don't still love him, do you"  
"I don't know if my love for Derek will ever die. But that's one kind of love. That kind of love that you have from being around the same person for so long. The love of obligation. It's not the love that keeps a marriage together, obviously."_

Derek went to the back of the trailer and dug through closet to the one box he hadn't opened. It was marked simply, all it said was "Addison". It was everything that he had brought that reminded him of her. He had shoved it all into this one box and put it as far away as he could. He opened it up. The thing on top was her blue blouse. It had gotten caught up in Derek's things. When he had angrily grabbed all of his things. He picked up the blouse. It smelled like the one perfume she had used to wear all the time. But now, her perfume was different. She had worn that perfume for at least five years. And then it was gone, with everything else of their marriage.

The thing underneath was a picture of them. He had taken the picture purposefully, as it was his favorite picture of them. He had thought that one day, maybe in ten years, maybe sooner, he would be able to point to that and say "Oh yes, that's my ex-wife, Addison." As a nice conversational piece. In the picture, they were sitting next to each other on the floor in front of the couch, at Derek's mother's house. Addison was leaning on his shoulder, a soft smile splayed on her face. Derek had placed one of his hands on her arm, gently stroking it. They both looked so happy, yet so at peace. Kathleen had taken the picture with her camera while they didn't know.

The next was his wedding ring. He had taken it off almost immediately after he had arrived in Seattle, he didn't want any reminder of the wedding that was. Addison had cried through almost the whole ceremony, but she had tried not to. They had snuck away from their reception, kissing passionately in the back, before returning flushed. The wedding had been the happiest day of his life.

The final thing was the flannel sheets. He had taken them, wet as they were, right out of the washer. They were the one thing he needed. When he could put them on his bed, he'd know he'd finally moved on. He had remembered coming home that night, the first time in a week. He had heard sounds from upstairs, and he remembered being frozen on the stairs, afraid to go up. He had seen the coat in the hallway, Addison's frilly white blouse, her jeans, and then Mark's shirt. He had peered into the room, and had seen Addison's look of horror as she opened her eyes and saw Derek in front of her. Mark had whipped his head around and quickly broken apart from Addison. Addison had fallen onto the bed, pulling the sheets around her and curling tightly into a ball. He'd never forget the look on her face. It was a look of endings, a look of complete misery, a look that broke his heart.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Derek walked through the hallways, landing in the elevator with Addison. She looked at him, grimacing when they both had to travel up four long floors in the same small elevator.

No one got on at the second floor. Addison shifted from foot to foot, something she did when she was nervous.

The third floor produced no one. Midway between the two floors, Derek pulled the emergency stop.

"What was that"  
"Addison, did you mean what you said yesterday in the stairwell"  
"What? Wait, you heard my conversation with Mark"  
"Yes. Did you mean what you said? You don't want me to be miserable"  
"I don't. I don't think you deserve it. You are, were, my husband, after all. Eleven years doesn't just disappear, no matter if we're divorced or not"  
"But I am miserable"  
"As a result of me"  
"Yes"  
"What? How? I mean, is it something I've done to you besides the obvious Mark stuff"  
"You said yesterday you only loved me in obligatory love. I'm miserable because you love me in no other way. No other way anymore. Is obligatory love the only way you love me? Is it really true"  
"It's true. Or, I hope one day, it could be"  
"But you still love me in something more than obligatory love"  
"Derek, now, yes, but just, give me time. We're done, Derek." Addison held up her left hand. "See, the ring's gone. It's in a box at my hotel. I wore that ring for the better part of 12 years. You took yours off first chance you got. Besides, you said you never wanted to see me again. Okay, I get it. You don't"  
They both stood there for a second before Derek reached to turn the elevator back on. Addison pushed his hand away and looked at him.  
"That was horrible. I'm sorry. I'm also sorry for┘for staying with Mark after you left. I'm not going to try to defend myself. It was horrible. I'm sorry. I just thought you needed to know"  
Addison pushed the start button again, and the elevator clicked to the top floor. Derek stepped out after Addison, and the two split, Derek's gaze following her all the way down the hall.


End file.
